So, if you follow me on twitter, I made a little confession the other day while on strong pain killers. I wasn't really planning to put it on my blog... but percocet and I don't mix well and I already came out of the closet. So here it goes...
I got a breast augmentation. (Technically it was a lift, but I will get around to that)
Before you go and judge, hear me out.
I have never been well endowed, and I grew up wanting boobs. Every woman in my family has a nice set of ladies. My mom always told me "Just be patient, they will come." Well, high school came and went, and they never made their appearance. In retaliation, I went as far as possible to stuffing my bra, without being "The Girl That Stuffs Her Bra." Water bra, gel bra, push up bra, miracle bra, a "boob job bra" and I once even wore two bras at once. Yes, I wanted boobs.
Since my boobs never really showed up on their own, I started to mention getting augmented a few years ago. My mom's response to this was that my boobs would come when I had kids, because "Her's did". Well boy did they!!! I jumped from a very small B to an enormous DD after Keating was born.
It was glorious.
I breast fed Keating, and it was definitely the right decision for us. But, it took a huge toll on my body. 4.5 months into breast feeding, my milk supply started to dwindle, which created a VERY unhappy baby. If you read my blog then, I'm sure you remember those dreadful days. Looking back, I think it had to do with going back on the mini birth control pill. I wouldn't do that again, but hind sight is 20/20.
Anyways, when my milk went away, so did the girls. I was left with deflated balloons. I had the rack of a 90 year old and it was very sad. Call me shallow, but this new change affected my self esteem. It changed how comfortable I felt in my clothes. I didn't want to wear a bathing suit, I wouldn't wear a V neck shirt, and I DID NOT want Brad to see me with my shirt off. Something had to be done.
I decided to schedule an appointment with a plastic surgeon, just to weigh out the options. I had never had surgery, and it seemed so drastic. I kept talking myself out of it. I went for my consult and discussed all of my concerns with the Dr. "Would I have to wait until after we were done having kids?" "Would I be able to breast feed again?" "How long would it be until I could pick up and hold Keating post surgery?" He addressed all of my concerns and completely put me at ease.
Turns out that my balloons didn't only need to be re-inflated, they also needed to be lifted. Everyone had acted like I was crazy for considering the procedure, but I wasn't imagining things or a little self conscious. I had affirmation that motherhood had truly taken its toll on my body.
Brad and I discussed everything after the consultation and I decided that I was going to do it. I scheduled my surgery and went back to the Dr for a Pre-op appointment to discuss details, and to choose the size I wanted. I by no means wanted to look like a fake big boobed Playmate, I wanted to look natural.
"Trying on" Implant sizes is a little deceiving. They have you put them into a sports bra, to give you an idea of how they will look after. Every size I tried on, I felt like Dolly Parton. They all seemed HUGE, but they explained to me that the implant wouldn't actually look that large because it would be held down by the muscle. That was a relief. I decided on a size range. My surgeon knew what I wanted the end result to be, so the actual size wasn't determined until surgery. That way he could compare two close sizes and see which looked better on me.
Last Tuesday we woke up at 4:30 am to get to the hospital for surgery. I was surprisingly not nervous at all, but I think Brad was. He kept asking "aren't you nervous?" Thankfully I felt very confident in my decision and in my Dr. I knew I had made the right decision. Around 7am I kissed Brad goodbye and they wheeled me into the O.R. I had only seen operating rooms on Grey's Anatomy, so I was surprised at how bright and unoppressive it was. I remember laying on the table and they made sure I was comfortable and warm..................... then next thing I knew, I was waking up in recovery.
To be continued...
I got a breast augmentation. (Technically it was a lift, but I will get around to that)
Before you go and judge, hear me out.
I have never been well endowed, and I grew up wanting boobs. Every woman in my family has a nice set of ladies. My mom always told me "Just be patient, they will come." Well, high school came and went, and they never made their appearance. In retaliation, I went as far as possible to stuffing my bra, without being "The Girl That Stuffs Her Bra." Water bra, gel bra, push up bra, miracle bra, a "boob job bra" and I once even wore two bras at once. Yes, I wanted boobs.
Since my boobs never really showed up on their own, I started to mention getting augmented a few years ago. My mom's response to this was that my boobs would come when I had kids, because "Her's did". Well boy did they!!! I jumped from a very small B to an enormous DD after Keating was born.
It was glorious.
I breast fed Keating, and it was definitely the right decision for us. But, it took a huge toll on my body. 4.5 months into breast feeding, my milk supply started to dwindle, which created a VERY unhappy baby. If you read my blog then, I'm sure you remember those dreadful days. Looking back, I think it had to do with going back on the mini birth control pill. I wouldn't do that again, but hind sight is 20/20.
Anyways, when my milk went away, so did the girls. I was left with deflated balloons. I had the rack of a 90 year old and it was very sad. Call me shallow, but this new change affected my self esteem. It changed how comfortable I felt in my clothes. I didn't want to wear a bathing suit, I wouldn't wear a V neck shirt, and I DID NOT want Brad to see me with my shirt off. Something had to be done.
I decided to schedule an appointment with a plastic surgeon, just to weigh out the options. I had never had surgery, and it seemed so drastic. I kept talking myself out of it. I went for my consult and discussed all of my concerns with the Dr. "Would I have to wait until after we were done having kids?" "Would I be able to breast feed again?" "How long would it be until I could pick up and hold Keating post surgery?" He addressed all of my concerns and completely put me at ease.
Turns out that my balloons didn't only need to be re-inflated, they also needed to be lifted. Everyone had acted like I was crazy for considering the procedure, but I wasn't imagining things or a little self conscious. I had affirmation that motherhood had truly taken its toll on my body.
Brad and I discussed everything after the consultation and I decided that I was going to do it. I scheduled my surgery and went back to the Dr for a Pre-op appointment to discuss details, and to choose the size I wanted. I by no means wanted to look like a fake big boobed Playmate, I wanted to look natural.
"Trying on" Implant sizes is a little deceiving. They have you put them into a sports bra, to give you an idea of how they will look after. Every size I tried on, I felt like Dolly Parton. They all seemed HUGE, but they explained to me that the implant wouldn't actually look that large because it would be held down by the muscle. That was a relief. I decided on a size range. My surgeon knew what I wanted the end result to be, so the actual size wasn't determined until surgery. That way he could compare two close sizes and see which looked better on me.
Last Tuesday we woke up at 4:30 am to get to the hospital for surgery. I was surprisingly not nervous at all, but I think Brad was. He kept asking "aren't you nervous?" Thankfully I felt very confident in my decision and in my Dr. I knew I had made the right decision. Around 7am I kissed Brad goodbye and they wheeled me into the O.R. I had only seen operating rooms on Grey's Anatomy, so I was surprised at how bright and unoppressive it was. I remember laying on the table and they made sure I was comfortable and warm..................... then next thing I knew, I was waking up in recovery.
To be continued...
I know exactly how you feel! I heard the same thing from my mom when I was a teenager. I was obsessed with having boobs, even when I was little. We have pictures of me with stuffed shirts when I was no more than four years old. Guess what? They never came. Until I started breastfeeding, and yes, it was glorious! I am dreading the day that I stop because I know what will happen.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely let us know how the recovery is because this is a surgery I may be considering in the future!
I hope you feel well and heal up quickly!
No judgment here! I already told my husband that after kids I plan on getting a lift and anything else that needs done. Good for you! Hope your recovery is swift!
ReplyDeletei plan on having a lift as soon as i can... sophia is only 23 days old and i am not breast feeding.. but i want to make sure i'm finished having children first. :)
ReplyDeleteGood for you! I hope you are loving the end result!
ReplyDeleteI have considered this as well and my husband is on board with a little "work" on the boob area after kids....Thank you so much for sharing!
ReplyDeleteno one should judge you at all!!! i got a boob job last september and it was the best decision i have ever made. i was barely a B and went to a D. i feel amazing!!! i was concerned about the whole playmate thing too...but the Dr. did an awesome job and i am so so pleased with everything.
ReplyDeletecongrats to being a 'new' woman :)
I'm on board with you 100% and I have not even had kids yet. I actually was the exact opposite and came in really yearly. I wasn't "Dolly Parton huge" but being a c in high school while doing sports will do something toyou 10 years down the road. I've wanted a lift and possibly a reduction for years but will most likely wait till we have at least 1 kid. Can't wait to hear the rest!
ReplyDeleteI am sooo glad you decided to share this! I am two months in to breast feeding my baby and I want to go to a year but I already know I WILL have my breast done before the next baby breast feeding has really done a number on my breast which I LOVED before pregnancy a nice full c I could never complain but now I am deflated unless I am full of milk, I just think having this done is one of those things that some women need for them selves and the happier and more comfortable you are with your self the better mom and person you are!
ReplyDeleteI had mine done in 2001 for the self esteem issues that you mentioned above & now that it has been almost 10 years & I have gone through one pregnancy & am now pregnant again I will be going through the procedure again!!
ReplyDeleteNo one should judge a decision that you made for yourself & if you feel better than your hubby can now see you again without your shirt than good for you & your hubby!!!
good for you! i strongly agree with getting it done if it improves your self esteem. i never had boobs when i was younger, I was an A. when i was 22 I decided to get them done, and I am a full B..totally natural looking. :)
ReplyDelete